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Hypocrites — 15 Comments

  1. Joyce, this is AWESOME and speaks volumes!!!

    So many, many “devout Followers” can talk the talk, but they do not have the ability to put into practical use the words of healing and support.

    For me, I’ve observed that the most vociferous and passage-quoting individuals are the ones to sit back and watch. If I felt the need to support ANY opinion, belief, or abuse, I could delve into ANY religious writing in ANY global religion to find a passage to support my choices, actions, and behaviors.

    Quoting passages is cheap – there’s no cost other than time to properly reference specific writings to one’s own purpose. It’s the behaviors, choices, and actions that speak louder, longer, and stronger than ANY quoted verse.

    Just my 2 cents on THAT issue. LOL!!!!

  2. Truthy, Jesus said that there would be “wolves in sheep’s clothing” come into the church the minute he was gone and he was right. Even Paul mentions the fakes that were in the churches only a few years after the church was formed. So this is nothing new.

    Jesus himself fought against the Jewish “fake teachers” who made rules for others that they themselves did not follow. He got mad enough about it to make a whip and drive the money changers out of the temple itself.

    That minister that was arrested for attempting to lure a 14 year old (he was sending pictures of his junk via the internet) Dickie Chance, well he was always preaching fire and brimstone, and never about loving or helping anyone….I spoke to him about it once a few months after the plane crash because the shouting and anger was triggering me, but it did no good. But after his arrest, I realized WHY he was so supportive of the pedophile who had “joined the church” LOL And you know, the people of the congregation were not there for me and I disassociated myself from them. I tried to talk to another minister that was a friend for years of my parents, and took supporting witnesses with me, as well as the ONE friend from the church that supported me, but the minister did not support me and in fact sent me a letter saying that “anger is a sin” Well, if Jesus was angry and said “be ye angry and sin not” and if Jesus was perfect then I don’t see a scripture that says anger is a SIN. It does say you should not be angry with your brother WITH OUT REASON. It also says “don’t let the sun go down on your wrath” which means don’t nurture anger until it becomes rage….but not because it hurts the person you are angry at but IT HURTS YOU. Anger and wrath are not the same thing. Anger is normal and reasonable when you have been hurt, but wrath is much MUCH more than anger, it is fermented anger that is dwelled upon until it becomes TOXIC to the person who harbors such bitterness.

    I don’t find one commandment in the entire Bible that hurts the person who obeys it, and I also don’t find one verse in the Bible that tells you to let anyone abuse you or allows you to abuse anyone else. Or have 70 child “brides” LOL

    Yea, this story is very illustrative of the hypocrites that Jesus warned about. Sitting in a church doesn’t make you a Christian any more than sitting in a chicken house makes you a chicken.

  3. Joyce, LOL!!!! Precisely.

    And, I have ingrained your words into my head to become a mandate for myself, and for others. “Watch, listen, and observe…” an individual in their habitat. They will, eventually, indicate whether they are trust-WORTHY, or not, by their own actions.

    When someone approaches me and says, “I’m a ‘nice’ person,” or, “You can trust me,” or, “I’ll NEVER do ______,” I take off my blinders and observe. Usually, the person is okay – I’ve been in such a state in the past few years that I have been suspicious of everyone for a multitude of reasons. But, I’m learning that there are many, many GOOD human beings out there. I can only determine the intent by observation WITHOUT emotions entering into the equation.


    • Did you read the comments? Another fine display of how badly ‘broken’ the system is and how others are often quick to judge, while not having walked three feet, let alone a mile in the shoes of others.

    • One Bad Pixie,
      Apparently, these christians were raising their children based on a book by Michael Pearl, which encourages parents to beat their kids. That’s why there is so much outrage.

      Maybe the people posting comments are not aware of that, or maybe it’s a spath trying to blame the victim again. While I realize that some children are very difficult, she was young enough to possibly benefit from therapy when she was adopted. They chose to use other methods to make her submit.

      • The comments were people passing judgement of one woman who had commented as she has adopted children out of foster care. All of a sudden she is the villian because the one child acted out badly.

        As she tells it, there is counselling for the child while in foster care, but once adopted- you’re on your own to deal with it and no help or guidance is given. She was giving firsthand account of her own situation and telling others not to judge unless you know all of the facts.

        If it is one thing I have come to know in several of the religious sects, it is this- They preach all day long about not judging others, but yet many of the congregation are quick to pass judgement as soon as they are outside of the walls of their place of worship. Gossiping is another no-no, but once outside, again anything goes. Actions speak louder than words and sometimes the tale they tell is almost frightening.

  4. I have come to know how actions speak far louder than words and yes, when you are down, you find out who your friends really are. I have become quite cynical and jaded as of late, but I can also see clearly, the heart of those who truly are good. I hold no ill will towards those who treat me fairly and with respect. The others- I find it rather sad that they are the way they are.

    I have always stood alone, been comfortable with that and never gotten into anything where I needed someone to ‘have my back’. Those who claim they have it for me, especially when it is unnecessary are those I watch the closest. Why do they feel the need to jump into the fray when clearly they are not needed. When they jump in, are they helping? Or did they claim to help while doing more harm than good?

    I have refused vehemently when others have told me they want me to depend on them. When they have been anything but dependable in the past, it is laughable at best.

    I have watched people who withdraw and literally HIDE when they have no answer concerning a due date of something they have promised. I would rather be told what’s going on, than lied to.

    I have seen a lot, but I am not surprised by the actions of others. Just when I think I have “seen it all”… Yeah. There’s always someone out there who will push the limits and go way past them.

    But somehow sitting in the pew, bowing your head during prayer and quoting the good book, makes it all better and it just goes away. Just like saying you’re sorry makes it all better. Yep. You bet it does.

  5. You know “passing judgment” is not always a bad thing. Jesus said that “by its fruits ye shall know it (a tree)” In other words if a person does bad things you can and SHOULD “judge” that person’s behavior, the “judge not least ye be judged” by the same yard stick is to not observe the “fruit” of that person’s behavior but to “judge” what they are THINKING.

    Also there were those in the days of Jesus just like today who used fake scales and measures when they sold food items…and he went on to say that they would cheat others by fake measures, but that THEY would be judged.

    We have plenty of hypocrites today that “judge” others for doing X but they are doing Y which is as bad or worse than X.

    That poor woman who adopted the 11 or 12 year old child out of Russia had the best of iintentions, but 1) The russian culture does not let a family abandon a child if there is family 2) the kids who are in Russian orphanages are many if not most times children who are genetically flawed and/or the mother was drunk the entire time she was preg with the kid, 3) many of those older kids are unmanageable and have conduct disorder etc.

    People “judged” that woman for sending the kid back to Russia, but my bet is that she was SCARED TO DEATH of the boy setting the house on fire or stabbing her to death in her sleep. I have worked with these kdis in inpatient situations and believe me I would NEVER GO TO SLEEP in the house with one of them, the ONLY thing they understand is superior FORCE 24/7 and they are dangerous.

    I don’t think the woman should have sent the kid back alone, but I do say this, that she had every right to and good sense to get him out of her house. There are kids that even by 8 or 10 years old are filled with “duping delight” and will engage in all kids of dangerous things and the truth is that in 99.9% of the time the BEST of therapy and medication does no good. It is SAD beyond belief that children that young are unable to be “helped” but society needs to face the fact that there are some who can NOT be helped. This old myth that “everyone can be helped” is NOT true.

    Pixie you are dead on with “actions speak louder than words.”

    Sky, thanks for the links….this is a good discussion and too many times offenders are the worst hypocrites there are…inside of prison or out of it. Too many in churches, schools, the medical fields, and corporate CEOs…Just like not long ago I found out that the CEO of GoodWill makes nearly 5 MILLION a year but they pay their disabled workers as little as 25 CENTS an hour….and the 4 regional CEOs under Mr. BIGSHOT make over a million each plus perks….I will never shop there again and never donate another thing to them. Salvation Army CEO, the TOP DOG makes $13,000 per year plus a house and a car and it ain’t a lexus either. LOL

    There are tons of “non profits” that are religious and non religious that rake in big bucks and spend it on their “management” so we need to be careful where we spend our charity contributions. If everyone checked out those then there would be a whole lot less waste on the fakers.

    Back when I was doing research for Patrick’s parole protest I found an organization that was national, and the Texas guy that worked for them turned out to be a SCAM ARTIST and I got his butt fired. I’m proud of that because he tried to get me to PAY HIM and not let the group know….e mail him privately. I collected the e mails which from the get go I realized was a scam and then I forwarded them to the CEO nationally and essentially told him, “Look you fire that guy or I will smear your group to heck and back” and guess what, the guy got fired.

    I’ve been “taken” a time or two on business deals some small some larger, and by con men and women, but I do keep a sharp look out and try to LISTEN TO MY INSTINCTS. If something doesn’t smell right, it’s probably rotten. And when I am warned about someone, I am very careful to not blow off the warning.

  6. Joyce- I agree that some level of judgement is acceptable and even good. Maybe that’s where the phrase ‘use your best judgement’ comes into play? But the hypocritical, knee jerk, snap judgements are usually the kind that start the snowball effect and bad things can happen to good people. To me, that’s where the “Judge not, lest ye yourself be judged’ verse comes into play.

    When people make a judgement based on half or less of the information on a situation, I ask myself- Would they make the same judgement if they knew what was really going on here? I know in my own situation, there are complications in place that others may not realize. Not everyone understands dealing with a spath. One friend has told me- You need to do this, You should tell him that. When I told her she doesn’t have to deal with the fallout or live thru the aftermath… she realized what that may be and changed her tune.

    In journalism, there may be facts they omit for whatever reasons. Maybe they feel that is giving too much information, maybe the writer doesn’t fully understand things or maybe they are limited on space? Even still, when things are written, they lose the inflection or tone of voice and how it might be said.

    How things are perceived is another thing. Perception can work in your favor or wickedly against you. I may write something and have one thing in mind, when suddenly a question pops up out of seemingly left field by someone who looked at it from a different pespective. This taught me in business that you have to have answers and be ready for anything. You never know what people look at, how they see it or where they are coming from. Unfortunately life with a spath is much the same and can be just as brutal if not worse.

  7. Pixie, you are right living with a psychopath or dealing with them at work or anywhere is brutal to say the least. While I encourage people who are in FEAR of the beast to RUN, leave everything else behind, just get your kids (if any) as much money as you can lay your hands on and RUN! But I realize there are times that unless you are in MORTAL DANGER immediately some advance planning is appropriate and will help you restart your life.

    I know your situation is miserable, but just keep in mind that you ARE making progress and soon you will be free of this beast.

  8. I believe that there is a universe of difference between “being judgmental,” and speaking truthfully.

    Judgment, IMHO, is projecting my beliefs and feelings ONTO another person’s actions or decisions. It’s me rendering a feeling about someone without having facts.

    Speaking truthfully is when a person observes and comes to a conclusion based upon facts, not feelings.

    In my previous life, I would hesitate to SEE the truths about various people because I believed that the GUT instinct was just me “being judgmental.” I was taught this, as a child. I was taught that my instincts and perceptions were faulty and that EVERYONE “deserved the benefit of the doubt.” My parents ingrained this into my head when my mother would pass out, drunk, my father would be involved in his civic organizations, and I would be afraid, cold, hungry, and filthy. “I won’t let that happen, again,” one or the other parent would assert. My GUT would tell me, “It’s going to happen, again, as long as mom drinks.” But, the people that I was obligated to trust – my parents – taught me to IGNORE this.

    So, I’ve finally learned that calling a spade what it is does NOT translate into my “being judgmental.” If I observe something that I will not tolerate or is completely “wrong” or inappropriate, I take the emotion (feelings) OUT of the equation and walk away without anger, resentment, malice, or anything else. It is what it is, and I can’t negotiate a more comfortable set of facts no matter how hard I might try.

    Speaking truthfully doesn’t apply to judgement. Feelings judge. Facts do not.

    • OOPS……….I typed the last sentence incorrectly! LMAO!!!!!!!

      Feelings = “judgmental”
      Facts = judgement call

      It’s a debatable thing, all the way around, but if I am denied the mandate to SEE truths and base a decision or choice on the facts, then I’m going to revert to “being judgmental.” Judge (recognizing facts) + mental (feelings) = judgmental.

  9. Truthy, well said, as Pixie said. If a tree grows apples it is a FACT it is an “apple tree” and if it grows “figs” it is not a grape vine…so the “fruit” that we produce shows what we ARE. So if a person consistently has rotten fruit, you can bet they are a rotten tree. But at the time we are calling the fruit of someone else “rotten” we better be sure our own is not rotten as well.

    I have to laugh about Patrick calling me disloyal for turning him in for robbing our friends business, yet he STOLE MY CAR to haul the loot! So who is disloyal? LOL

    I’m done with people who misbehave and yet consider themselves without “sin” and will pick up that rock and throw it…the story about the woman caught in adultery being stoned and Jesus saying what he did about these “self righteous” men stoning a woman caught in adultery when they were also committing adultery with harlots.

    None of us are perfect, but you know, we should be able to see the worms in the apples and figure out that we dont’ want the apple that’s rotten and wormy.

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