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Psychopaths in power — 25 Comments

  1. Watched a show on TV last night about the finding of and conviction of a physician who had treated 42 patients who did NOT have cancer with massive doses of chemo, and when 4 patients had found out or suspected, he talked them into more chemo and gave them massive over doses which killed them or put them into an irreversible coma….he had first been charged with fraud for the 14 million dollars in bills the insurance companies and the patients had paid, but the massive doses he gave the other patients at first couldn’t be proven, then when they were…the 42 fraud patients were not allowed to testify…but of course in the end, the good guys won when the bad guy’s attorney opened a door to “other patients” when she questioned a police officer and of course the bad psychopath went to prison for murder. I wish all of the stories like this resulted in the bad guy going to prison for life, for ruining the lives of the 42 women who did not have cancer with the horrors of chemo, and killing those 4 women who also didn’t have cancer and died. Unfortunately it isn’t always the case. Juanita and the many other women who have come forward and the tens of women who came forward about Bill Cosby—maybe there will be some justice for them and for humanity itself, but maybe that’s wishful thinking.

  2. I think sometimes the wealthy, powerful, famous, whatnots ‘skate’ with a slap on the wrist or less, because sometimes people look at them with some amount of pity and misunderstanding. They have all of this money, power, fame or ???? Why would they possibly do that? How COULD they do that?

    People often don’t want to believe the bad things about someone they might consider a hero or that they admire. That would be disappointing that they were wrong, they were fooled or they weren’t smart enough to see thru them and their bad behavior.

    Cosby, Clinton, Sandusky and several others mentioned are prime examples. I think people are led to believe, you don’t get that far in life being a bad person.

  3. Phoenix, I think that your take on the celebrity safety status is pretty spot-on. We know differently because we have survived experiences with individuals who have proven themselves UN-trustworthy and disordered. But, even with the experiences of abuse, neglect, abandonment, fraud, etc., I still tried to stuff these individuals into MY system of beliefs: nobody that I could care about would BE that type of person, so it can’t be true.

    Someone once explained that cognitive dissonance is physically painful – it hurts on a physical level to wrestle with the facts that someone we might care about, admire, or respect turns out to be very, very bad. So……instead of working through the pain, we simply invent reasons or excuses as to why these people are behaving the way that they are.

    “It was an accident.”
    “S/he didn’t MEAN to do that.”
    “Those people are out to GET him/her.”
    “S/he is trying to get money from him/her.”

    And, so on.

    With the availability of social media and global information, it MIGHT be that this whole technology explosion will begin to sort itself out and that people will begin to see and read more and more FACTS as opposed to RUMORS and begin accepting that there are “bad people” in very high places. This is a possibility and, for my part, something that I actually “hope” will happen. Then again, people are taking things way, way out of proportion with the use of social media and global information JUST to cause a world of hurt and confusion.

    We’ll see…………

  4. Zen- I agee that there are people who will try to make others look bad thu whatever means possible (social media) and may hope to gain something from it in the process. TMZ, the tabloids and the internet makes it easy for everyone to be a keyboard jockey and “break the news” to the world about celebrities caught in uncompromising positions and awkward situations. Sometimes even the news channels will talk about a story with the lead in being- “It’s RUMORED recently that this big name celebrity/ politician/ sports figure/ what have you, was blah, blah, blah,,, It’s like they are leading viewers not to believe these ‘bad seeds’ did anything wrong. Power of suggestion much???

  5. Unfortunately, guys, I don’t think the “general public” is all that shocked by bad behavior and if someone is a media idol or politician they tend to forget what they have done that is “so bad” or play it off as rumors EVEN WHEN THERE IS EVIDENCE of criminal activity. Teddy Kennedy being reelected over and over and the clinton’s popularity just makes me shake my head. Yet others for lesser crimes are pilloried

    I saw on the news last night about Cosby’s defense LOL sick!!! But I have a feeling he is going to be convicted. I hope so.

  6. The whole idea of Billary being elected as president disgusts me.

    I also kind of wonder, just how much of their ‘popularity’ is the media itself? We all know the government hides stuff from the public. So how much of what we are being fed about Billary being so popular is all just media hype and how much of it is reality? You and I will never know.

  7. Phoenix, I read a biography of Teddy Roosevelt and how he manipulated the media to make himself appear “more manly” etc. and I really think that “politics as usual:” goes back to the days we lived in tribes where “public opinion” was manipulated by stealth and force. The Romans used “bread and circuses” to keep the public distracted It is that way around the world and for the population of the US to think our government doesn’t do the same is lunacy. I read a survey (not sure how accurate) that said that 75% of the us public thinks our government is corrupt. Actually I think that is probably a good figure. Between the people who don’t pay any attention to politics and/or the news (apathy) and those who are involved in some cause or other to support the liberal agenda, I dont’ have a lot of confidence in our leaders. The “good old days” were just as corrupt as well, so I dont’ think it has been a “change” from good to bad, but democracies only last about 200 years before they collapse (if history is an indicator) and become dictatorships for a while.

    Psychopaths and tyrants have been in political power since the days of the tribes, and I think that isn’t going to change as long as there are humans on earth. We h ave been blessed to grow up and live in a country with a reasonable amount of safety on our shores, though we have been involved in over seas wars…WWI and II, Korea, Viet Nam, Middle east, etc which cost many American lives, but until 9/11 there hasnt’ been an attack on the mainland in a long time.

    With the current unrest in the world though, It wouldn’t surprise me if that changed though. But these things are nothing new at all. There have always been wars fought by psychopaths in grabs for power, resources, and land. Unfortunately as for the average joe citizen there is little we can do about it. On a personal level however, we can and we MUST eliminate more individual threats to our safety and security, to say nothing of our mental health.

    Staying in a “stew” over the things we cannot change isn’t going to help us, just keep us under more stress. And as we all know, STRESS KILLS. I’m finally getting to the point that I can OBSERVE these things on the news and in the world but not stress out about it because I can ACCEPT that I can’t personally change things. I vote (for whatever good that does) and I’m pretty cynical about politics and those in power in this country and in others, but ACCEPTING that I cannot change things gives me peace about it.

    • Certainly, powerful people are going to manipulate the media to their advantage, and it’s up to each individual to determine how their beliefs are going to fall out. I can sit back and point at this one and that one and say, “Lookit that! They’re actually believing that bullshite, and we KNOW it’s a lie!” Sure, I can. But, I can also look back on my own history when people probably said the same thing about my trust in others.

      People not only make stupid choices, but they’re “allowed” to, sad as it is. MY task is to not get caught up in the drama/trauma and to make healthy and wise decisions based upon my own experiences and the facts, at hand. If the FACTS don’t seem credible, then I will take my time, do some research, and make a choice after long and deep contemplation. I’m not that knee-jerk person, anymore. Thank GAWD!!

  8. Zen, getting rid of the “knee jerk” reactions is not easy and I am not sure that we ever totally get rid of it. We were trained from childhood to have that reaction, and it is the “fall back” position. Especially under stress.

    Dr. Eric Berne’s “Games People Play” likens this to the “parent” tapes that we imbibed with our mother’s milk, those “tapes” (ideas) don’t ever go away, but we CAN push the MUTE button when they start to play. Just like the “tape” about “everyone deserves a second chance” myth, and “there is good in everyone” myth…when we start to “feel” these emotions generated by those “tapes” we must first RECOGNIZE what is “playing” and then hit the MUTE button. When we are under stress or PRESSURE from others sometimes it is difficult to stand our ground and say “NO, he does NOT deserve a second or 10th chance, he has proven by his ACTIONS that he is a psychopath”

    Sometimes the people who put pressure on us actually are not malicious, only misguided. Others are reacting to their own childhood training as enablers, trying to “keep the peace” at all costs, usually YOURS.

  9. Zen, I know what you mean about the knee jerk reactions. What I’m dealing with now is maddening in a different way. Because of all of the stress and drama from moving out and ending things with the spath, I like to have a plan in place and dates, times, etc. in mind of when, where and how things will happen when the other shoe drops. Some of my friends are at their wits end with me sometimes because they think I put too much thought, effort, time and energy into this. I just like to have a plan and some idea in mind of what could or may happen, so I’m not stuck holding the bag or caught with my pants down so to speak when the sh!t hits the fan.

    Joyce- I totally get it that the people putting pressure on us actually aren’t malicious, only misguided. They don’t always know the details of the situation and can only make a statement of what they *think* they would do if they were in our shoes. I had to remind people often when they would start ranting at me, about how they think things should go, should have happened or what I should have said- “You don’t have to deal with the fallout or the aftermath” I may agree with them 1000%, but I’m the one that has to live with whatever happens next.

  10. Phoenix, I definitely know what you are talking about….but I also remember how stressed out I was at the time Hamilton was plotting against me….I wanted to “predict the future” and have a plan etc. but I was so stressed out, scared, upset, hurt, etc that my “thinking” wasn’t all that good. And actually while “planning for the future” is a good thing to some extent, we also must realize that we can not predict the future or predict all possible things that might come to pass. Believe me, I TRIED! LOL

    A couple of summers ago when I ‘melted down” while preparing the parole protest for Patrick, I also went into the spin cycle and couldn’t make good decisions or plans on how to take every precaution for every situation.

    You are right, WE must make our own decisions and live with the consequences, but I think it is important too that we are CALM when we consider our options. Others who may give us “advice” probably don’t get the whole situation, but we aren’t required to listen to them and sure nuff aren’t required to take their advice.

    • Joyce, I just like to have a Plan and also possibly a Backup plan in place. No I cannot predict what WILL happen, but at this point we all have a pretty good idea of what MAY happen (good and bad) and it is not a bad thing to prepare for BOTH.

      We all know how we WANT things to go, but in reality, we all know that, that doesn’t always happen. So we Hope for the Best, Plan for the Worst and take what we get from there. Sometimes we can file for an appeal, ask for a do-over or file an amendment to ‘fix’ things after the fact. Sometimes, but not always.

      I got fired from a job once. I learned really fast about having a backup plan in place. You never know when the rug can or will get pulled out from under you. Sometimes we don’t have the ‘safety net’ below us that we thought we did.

      With the whole thing about moving out of the house-of-spath, it was the unknown that bothered me the most. Not having a definitive ‘date’ of WHEN this would happen….. That was the most bothersome part to me. How long until THIS happens? When will the authorities step in? After this happens, then what? What should I expect from there? Part of this was that there were SOOOO many questions and NO answers. It was uncharted territory for me, and undoubtedly for many others as well.

      Some days it was hard for me to even breathe and other days it was about all I COULD do…. Thru it all, at least I could control that. I had to remind myself to just stop and take a deep breath. Breathe in, breathe out, breathe in, breathe out….

      • Yea, Phoenix, PLANNING is a good thing, but I know from experience that sometimes when we are in a SPIN CYCLE we tend to not plan well. Believe me I know, I made a lot of poor decisions and “plans” when I was spinning, but I did save my life I believe by deciding to RUN….and hide…until after Hamilton and my Daughter in law, Laurel Alexander, were arrested. They dropped most of the charges on them (plea bargains) but they both spent time in county jail (her about 9 months) and him 10 months in jail and 7 or 8 in PRISON…and I do believe if I had not fled I would have been murdered.

        Their attempt to kill my son Andrew and stealing 25K$ from my mother after they realized I was GONE, and they couldn’t find me to carry out Plan A, they went to the plan B. but that didn’t work out either and they ended up being arrested. I can only thank God I had enough sense left to make a plan to FLEE.; And it wasn’t easy to come to that decision.

        I think about the Jewish family that left Germany before the Holocoust when they saw the “handwriting on the wall” they tried to get others to go with them, walk out with nothing but the clothes on their back but their relatives and friends kept saying “but what would we do with the furniture?” Well those that stayed DIED because they worried about their “stuff” where he and his family left, and settled eventually in Canada, but SAFE. I felt like those relatives when I was loath to leave my house and my stuff, figuring that they’d steal or burn it, but finally decided like the man in Germany, my life is worth more than my “stuff”

        • Joyce, that “spin cycle” is recognized in the psychiatric/psychological communities as “Catastrophic Thinking,” and I’m sure that you already know this.

          It’s very important to note that this is a conditioned response to ANY traumatic event, regardless of the level of trauma that it might score. For instance, someone who has experienced a lifetime of trauma might view a late bill as a threat to their safety and well-being. The vortex begins to spin, and they jump down that rabbit hole of anxiety because it is familiar and they don’t KNOW any other way to respond. I know this from personal experience – it’s ingrained.

          I had a number of “plans” ready, and none of them turned out the way that I had anticipated – spin the vortex! I know more people than not that also had plans that never came to fruition, and they went down that hole because their reactions were conditioned – they were literally unable to stop, breathe, calm themselves, and contemplate other options.

          “Contemplation” is a gentler and less aggressive consideration of all options available. It’s done with calm, balance, and wisdom rather than fear, shame, and emotional reactions.

          There’s the story of the former friend that I had that had planned to kick out her abusive bi-polar (diagnosed) and high-in-sociopathic-traits boyfriend AFTER she had graduated and found a position in the medical field. She actually SAID this, in conversation, “I’m just using him to pay my mortgage until I graduate.”

          Well…………..the boyfiend became more and more threatening and she finally made a decision to file for a restraining order against him. He was kicked out of the house, taking the mortgage payment with him. Then, her son decided to move out, taking his child support with him. She was left, jobless, and in a state of anxiety and depression that I was personally familiar with. And, still……she held on to that property as if it were a life ring and she still owed a ton of money on it.

          So……….she had made her own plans based upon fear, desperation, shame, and a host of other issues that she may, or may not, have addressed.

          I finally ended the relationship with this woman after she had verbally attacked me for the third (and, final) time. I did so without malice and I had to grieve that loss because she had been very kind, giving, and supportive after I ended my second marriage. I tried to return that to her, but it wasn’t enough. She wanted things that I simply couldn’t (and, WOULDN’T) provide, and the relationship became toxic to me. I still have compassion for her experiences and her plight, but I cannot involve myself in her life, anymore.

          • Zen, I hadn’t heard of “Catastrophic Thinking”, but I have seen how when some of us hit the “Spin Cycle” we actually STOP thinking. We may shut down for a while and just “check out on life” altogether because we are so consumed by emotions- grief, pain, fear, anxiety, anger and the whole gamut of things we are feeling because of what we have been thru.

            When we start thinking again, it may not be all that rational and yes, it could certainly be “Catastrophic” because we sure aren’t ready for rational thought yet.

  11. Zen,

    I may be a little confused on this one.

    If I read that right, it sounds to me like the deposition was granted for a civil case and Cosby would receive immunity to the criminal aspect of it, for this one rape only. It seems like now his attorney is asking the immunity be a general ‘cover’ for any and all other later charges.

    Was that anyone else’s take on the story? It may also be the spin the author put on it, I’m not sure. I’m asking in order to clarify things if nothing else.

  12. Phoenix and Zen, here is a link to an article that Truthspeak wrote a while back on the spin cycle http://familyarrested.com/catastrophic-thinking-all-or-nothing/ and it is a good one.

    Zen you made some VERY good points about the spin cycle/catastrophic thinking above. But the level of anxiety can PARALYZE us entirely to where we can’t make good decisions.

    I can look back in retrospect and see several times in my life I was in the spin cycle, and I know how easy it is to fall back into it where we make decisions based on false or faulty thinking. We have a “panic attack” but it is not a short lived one, but one that goes on and on and on. That level of anxiety is not healthy for us in any way at all. We need all our wits to make good decisions based on LOGIC not FEAR or ANXIETY.

    When that spin cycle reaches the level of PTSD we need HELP in the form of professional therapy to help us regain our balance, but I do know that if we are not careful we can FALL INTO THAT HOLE AGAIN. I intend to check myself for signs I am falling into the hole and go back for more therapy if that is what it takes.

  13. Zen, that article about the admission affidavit, and the pay offs to “other women” and the testimony of the dozens of women he raped, well, I view this as the same way I view the lawyer who presented the murderer the defense of consensual sex gone wrong in the case of the murder of Beverly Carter. And you know, I understand why your father wouldn’t like attorneys, I don’t much like them either.

    I am FORTUNATE to have a wonderful attorney for patrick’s parole protests who doesn’t gouge me for a huge fee etc and is good at what he does.

    My husband didn’t like attorneys either. One time when he was a teenager Patrick said he wanted to be an attorney when he grew up and my husband said to him, “well, why don’t you do something HONEST, maybe be a PIMP” LOL

  14. I am very thankful that Hillary Clinton lost the election. She is a psychopath who crazily married a psychopath, Bill Clinton. Hillary Clinton is a modern day Jezebel. There are many, many people who saw through her and thankfully, did not elect her.

    – bluejay

  15. Bluejay, I am of the opinion that BOTH candidates are high on the psychopath check list made by Dr. Hare, both very narcissistic and grandiose, and unfortunately, in many countries not only our own this type of person rises to positions of power.

    It seems to me that a certain group of psychopaths like my son Patrick become criminals and land in prison, but others use their narcissistic personality and smarts to rise to positions of wealth and power. Mainly I believe BECAUSE they are willing to step on or over anyone who gets in their way, and to lie and do not have a moral compass.

    In a book written about the ways to succeed in life called I think the 40 laws of power the author describes just how to be a success by using psychopathic reasoning and how to lie your way to success.

    In the time I spent working I saw many of this type of person in the “corner office” and they caused great distress for those employees working under them.

    Fortunately now that I am retired I do not have to associate with dysfunctional or psychopathic individuals and my life is peaceful except for the normal things that vex a person like a flat tire or the washing machine needing to be replaced.

  16. During the election, I realized that Bill Clinton married a psychopath, Hillary Clinton. The two of them were made from the same cloth. If you study her family-of-origin background, it’s clear that she had family members who were disordered. Realizing that Hillary Clinton is a psychopath herself was quite shocking.

  17. Blue, I agree with you that both of them are psychopaths, and I draw my conclusions from their illegal and immoral behavior and their apparent greed. Bill being from my state I have had access to much information that showed psychopathic behavior and greed. It is sad, but many people who run for political office are highly narcissistic, which is a sign and symptom of traits of psychopaths.

  18. Recently the “me too” folks have come out and OUTED dozens of high corporate executives and politicians, including Donald Trump for sexually inappropriate things such as bad language, up to and including out right rape. Dozens of News Reporters, film and music producers, public servants etc.

    Many people are “morally incompetent” (as James Cormey said about Trump) for their positions of power.

    Juanita Broderick was called a “slut” for accusing Clinton, and the porn star was called a “victim.” I don’t approve of her line of work for sure, but she is also a victim. The pay offs and the secrets they are supposed to keep for the pay off are a little ethically suspect for me, but that is just my opinion.

    Many rapes of all kinds go unreported because of the shame that is engendered in the victim. I hope the “meToo” group encourages more folks, both male and female to report.

    Recently here in Arkansas several teachers have been arrested for having sex with students.

    The old deal where if a male teachers has sex with a girl, he is a monster, but if a female teacher has sex with a male student, the student just “got lucky” is changing

    It is true that many young people today become sexually active at a younger age than they become “wise” about sex. Sex feels good and it is natural for the hormones to surge and increase their interest in this activity. But besides unwanted babies, and unwanted diseases the mental problems and emotional problems caused by engaging in this activities can leave lasting scars.

    Adults who prey on this vulnerability of the youth deserve to be punished, but unfortunately according to Dr. Anna Salter who is an internationally recognized expert on pedophiles, they do not reform. Many “first time offenders” she states are actually only caught after 150 to 300 offenses.

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